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"I’ve found numerous ways to deal with my anxiety that I’d like to share with you."

Tips to Help Cope With Anxiety

As a prior self-proclaimed extrovert, I never thought I’d have to deal with anxiety. I used to thrive in a crowded environment — I loved being with a large group of friends, in a packed bar or in a lively classroom setting. When my son was born two and a half years ago, something changed.

I don’t know what exactly caused the change, but I suddenly became an extrovert with anxiety.

During times when I would previously find myself talking to new people, speaking in front of a crowd, and otherwise just enjoying that type of setting, I was withdrawing because I felt like the world was caving in. I also found myself worrying about irrational things, leading to anxiety, even if I was by myself.

I’ve come to realize over the past two and a half years that anxiety is a lifelong battle to control. I have good days and bad days; however, I’ve found numerous ways to deal with my anxiety that I’d like to share with you.

1. Yoga

In addition to suffering from anxiety, I recently had a meningioma diagnosis — a non-cancerous brain tumor. Prior to the birth of my son, I did a lot of yoga — in the classroom setting and on my own. I kept it up during pregnancy, but after his birth, physical activity in general fell to the wayside.

I picked yoga up again after reading through Facebook posts from other people with meningiomas. One person said she had started a daily yoga practice after her diagnosis and it had changed her life.

I started in my living room, doing yoga along with YouTube videos. Before long, I was practicing crow pose and working on handstands again — still unsuccessfully, though!

Yoga has made such a huge difference in my anxiety levels that I am beginning a 200-hour yoga instructor training — I am hoping to bring that clarity to other people’s lives as well.

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2. Grounding Techniques

When I first began having anxiety, my best friend emailed me a link about grounding techniques. Basically, the purpose of grounding techniques is to distract from the irrational thoughts while calming yourself — my favorite is counting.

If I’m feeling anxious and I’m by myself, I’ll close my eyes, breathe, and slowly count to 100, while trying to clear my mind. If I’m in public (because closing my eyes and counting to 100 may look silly), I’ll either take slow, deep breaths and count to 100 in my head, or I’ll find something in the room and count.

For example, I may count the tiles on the ceiling or the number of people wearing hats. I am almost always feeling better by the time I count to 100 or before I can count all the objects.

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3. Writing

This may not come as a shock, as I am a writer, but writing about what is causing me anxiety makes me feel better.

Sometimes I’ll write in the form of journaling. Sometimes I’ll make lists. Other times, I’ll write out pros and cons if a decision is causing me anxiety.

My husband doesn’t suffer from anxiety, or at least not to the extent that I do, but you can find notebooks or pieces of paper in almost every room in the house — we are both prone to writing when we need to make a decision that is causing angst. It is not uncommon to find lists littering our household.

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4. Exercise

Aside from yoga, walking brings me a sense of calm. When I am feeling anxious, I put on a pair of comfortable shoes, put my son in his stroller, and take off.

I often turn my phone on silent so I am not disturbed. I try to enjoy the sun or the wind, the scenery, and the time with my son. I find that when I am in a regular walking routine, my anxiety is better overall.

You may find a different type of exercise that is soothing for you, such as running, hiking, swimming, or biking. Find something that allows you to get moving and that you enjoy — and do it regularly.

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5. Ritual

For me, coffee is relaxing. The aroma, the taste, the feel of the warm mug in my hands — I instantly have a sense of calm once I hear it percolating.

Hot tea has a similar effect — I brew my tea using a teapot on my stove because I love the process and enjoy hearing the teapot whistling.

Coffee may seem strange to some people — after all, caffeine is a stimulant and for some people may worsen anxiety. The point here is finding a routine that is soothing that can bring about a sense of calm; for me, the process of making coffee or tea is almost as calming as the beverage itself.

Anxiety is a mental illness, so please discuss it with your doctor. Although I use a variety of techniques to manage my anxiety, I have also reached out to my physician.

I take medication and am also in therapy. Mental illness can unfortunately be very stigmatizing — if you need help, please ignore the stigma and seek it.

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